God: I made you in my image and likeness. You came from a man and a woman, your dad and mom.
As a kid, you saw traits from your mom as “feminine”, and traits from your dad as “masculine”. This is a simplification made from immaturity. If you step back a generation, you’ll see your dad had traits from his dad and mom that you now identify as “masculine”, whether they came from his dad or from his mom; and your mom has traits from her dad and mom that you now identify as “feminine”, whether they came from her dad or from her mom.
You are a man. But you came from a man and a woman, so you will see traits from both in you, not only in how you look but in how you think and behave.
The reality is, nobody knows what “feminine” or “masculine” is except from their own parents, birth or otherwise. For some, “feminine” means a homemaker; for others, it means CEO. For some, “masculine” means CEO; for others, it means a homemaker.
Jacob was a homebody, but Esau was a man of the field. Both were men. I didn’t go “Jacob is too feminine to walk in my purpose; he should be like Esau”.
Jacob was a romantic. He was his mom’s favorite. In your culture, he would not be considered very manly. Yet he was the man I chose. I didn’t say “part of your training is to become more like Esau”. While he looked after flocks, he didn’t become a hunter like Esau.
You are artistic. You like to care about appearance. You even had someone say of your apartment “this is really nice… for a guy”. You had multiple people ask if you lived alone. Joshua—they weren’t expecting a man to set things up so well. And where do you get that trait from?
Your mom. Did I make a mistake, and accidentally give you your mom? Not at all. I’m glad she is your mom. I’m glad your dad is your dad too.
You do realize that the man in Jacob’s life—his father—didn’t favor him because Esau was more his type of son? That is a soul-crushing REALITY. While it is true that one of the sons in that culture would get a birthright, you do know that Jacob blessed ALL HIS SONS. He didn’t repeat the same mistake his father made. Isaac could have had a separate blessing for Esau and Jacob. Why not get both his sons, announce he would bless them both, and send them both on separate errands?
What Jacob did is what most men in your culture wish they could do too. They see men that have the blessing of a mentor, a father-figure, they see someone else’s dad, and want the blessing of a father. And if they can’t have it… if only they could STEAL IT.
You have my blessing. Jesus is the firstborn among many brethren, but you are co-heir. In other words, you’re not getting less of the birthright. I VALIDATE YOU.
I’m not going to demand you become more like Esau first. My blessing is YOURS.